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If you were/are a parent...

What is your personal greatest challenge with parenting, or what do you think would be your greatest challenge, if you had kids?

For me, I find that coming up with relevant and appropriate consequences for inappropriate behaviour, is one of the hardest things about parenting. It's the thing with which I most struggle. That and patience.



( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:07 pm (UTC)
Trying to be more of a friend than a Mom, for the longest time my daughter really was the best and only friend I had.
I allowed this to override a lot of the decisions and things that should have been parenting not friendship.
I'm a big suck and try to be badass but usually end up snuggling instead. :/
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:15 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I could see how that would be a really big challenge... I think you're doing an awesome job though :)
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:39 pm (UTC)
Heh, when I first read this my initial thought was "but I'm done..."
Never done, it never ends, they are always your children, you can always teach them stuff and vice versa, there are ugly bumps to come but you've got so many wonderful experiences awaiting you with your wee ones I'd be jealous if I didn't have the granddaughter to visit occasionally. ;)
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:48 pm (UTC)
It's an exciting journey, that's for sure :)
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:20 pm (UTC)
Lack of patience, absolutely.

I mean, I'd like to think that motherhood would change me, maybe chill me out a little. But really? I'm just not sure I could deal with a kid's issues 24/7 without totally losing it. I really just don't feel like I have the temperament for it.

I get that from my own mother, I think. As I mentioned earlier, in hexkitten's journal, she used to chase me around with a wooden spoon. Which, I'm sorry, that just makes me laugh so much now. Highly recommended.
Oct. 6th, 2009 11:52 pm (UTC)
I think I have more patience than my parents. I also think that when my frustration levels hit new highs, my tendency is to resort to what they did as far as punishment and coping. It's a struggle, but definitely one worth fighting.
Oct. 7th, 2009 12:09 am (UTC)
It's hard to respond to that without knowing exactly your parents' methods were, but I don't believe that you have to get too sophisticated with a punishment to get your point across.

My mother spanked me, possibly with the aforementioned wooden spoon, I don't remember. That might have just been a scare tactic. But I'm not traumatized by it, and I learned my lesson when I was out of line. She didn't smack me around, she didn't bruise and batter me, but she demonstrated authority in a way that was totally clear. I'm the grown-up, you're the kid, you listen to me. End of story.

And I mean, you know. I loved my mom. So much. She was awesome.

I guess there is always that struggle to do things differently, though, to do them better. Maybe if I have kids I'll change my tune. Who knows.
Oct. 7th, 2009 04:20 am (UTC)
I think you also would make an awesome mom :)
Oct. 7th, 2009 02:09 am (UTC)
Being physically out of shape, such that I cannot always hold my daughter when she wants/needs to be held, because my spine cannot handle the combination of her weight and mine for long periods. Sometimes I have to put her down when she has to be held, and it breaks my heart.
Oct. 7th, 2009 04:21 am (UTC)
Oh I hear you. When I was pregnant with Stephen, it nearly killed me when Alex wanted to be held, and I just physically couldn't do it. I didn't even have a lap for her to sit on :(
(Deleted comment)
Oct. 7th, 2009 04:22 am (UTC)
Hmm. I might have some suggestions for you... but they're all likely things you would have already come across.

Are you on an acreage, or in the city? I forget...
Oct. 9th, 2009 03:49 pm (UTC)
Patience. No doubt about it. I have little with adults, not to mention kids.
Oct. 14th, 2009 06:24 pm (UTC)
It's definitely a huge challenge.
Oct. 14th, 2009 05:04 pm (UTC)
Sacrificing myself to parenthood without completely losing my identity that is separate from parenthood/matrimony. I mean, I want to be selfless and give all that I can to my baby but at what point do I say, "I need to take an hour and create art/work on a project/go for a walk and try to answer those burning questions that got put on hold?"

I also struggle with the lack of sleep. Nobody warned me how long the sleeplessness truely lasted. I was all ready to have at it for the newborn/0-6 period, but I get less sleep now at 14.5 months than I did then.
Oct. 14th, 2009 06:25 pm (UTC)
I hear you on that. I got more sleep when my daughter was a newborn, than when she became a toddler.
( 15 comments — Leave a comment )

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